Once again it is time for Friday High Five courtesy of Angela.

• The idiot who persists in calling here showing the (illegal) fake caller id of  1-558-4 so I can’t file a report with the FCC. Never anyone on the other end and they never leave a message either. Another telemarketeer gone bad.

• The lady with three dogs who wanted to shirk poop patrol in the park today. We (the city) dispense poop cleanup bags for free in several locations in the park and yet this dipstick let her dogs poop and started to walk off. It *was* kind of amusing to watch her face when I asked if she hadn’t forgot something. She started to huff no rather indignantly and then recognized me; suddenly she decided to perform poop patrol. {*grin*} I didn’t have the heart to let on that I meant the glove she had dropped on the ground.

• The young gentleman who answered his mothers phone and promised to give her the message that yes I would indeed once more read at the elementary school as part of Monday’s Read Across America, the celebration of Dr. Seuss’ birthday. Today, more than a week later, his mom called to see what happened and why I wasn’t reading this year. Fortunately, all will end well and I’ll be there Monday. (Theodore Geisel (Dr. Seuss) is a fellow alumni of Dartmouth College and someone I actually met in the flesh while in college. I love reading Dr. Seuss to a class of kids!)

• The person walking in front of me at Wally World last night with pants riding so low that all were involuntarily exposed to her nether regions. I really didn’t need to know what style (thong) and color (bright red) of underwear she was wearing. I was deeply afraid that she would turn around and face me and that I would learn that she had piercings in a rather private area. They were *that* low. I just wanted to buy my milk and leave without being scared forever by that sight. This would have been much preferable:

• The person who decided that early in the morning was a good time to park in the alley behind the house and carry on a loud conversation with himself while the radio blared. I suspect it was my nearly deaf neighbor, so maybe I can forgive this transgression. But it sure sounded and felt a bit like this:

So what’s on your list for today?