Category Archives: mama kat

Ten Alternate Realities

Time once more for Mama Kat’s Writer’s Challenge. (Which I wouldn’t miss in spite of my scarcity earlier in the week.)

This weeks topics:

1.) List of 10 things blogging has taught you.

2.) “Oh please make this a topic for Writer’s Workshop. Pick your favorite song and record your own personal bathroom concert series. I’ll totally do a concert series, I bet I could get my hubby or brother to join in. Now I just need a song… (inspired by Kerri from I’m Just Sayin)

3.) “Sometimes when it’s hard to see with the eyes I’ve been given, I strap on my camera and pray for new ones. I did that yesterday. It helped.” (inspired by Emily from Chatting At The Sky)

4.) “let he who hath no sin cast the first stone…” Is there anything you have judged prematurely, only to find yourself walking in the same shoes later? (inspired by Stephanie from This Blessed Life)

5.) List your top 10 “Spring Trends”. (inspired by Tricia from Desperately Seeking Silence)

#1 – Ten Things Blogging Has Taught Me

  • Bloggers come and go; rare is the 3+year blogger.
  • Newbies are always welcome.
  • A touch of graphical panache helps the words go down.
  • There is no predicting what will be popular with readers.
  • Taste is a individual thing.
  • Subject matter can compensate a lack of writing skill, at least temporarily.
  • Interesting blogs (to me) feature lives and interests disjunct from my own.
  • Blogging takes a back seat to life and work for most of us from time to time.
  • Blogging is addictive in the sense of feeling guilty when you haven’t written for a few days.
  • Powerful blogs are emotionally raw and uncensored. The rest of us have to be amusing or erudite to make up for lack of raw.

#2 – Bathroom Concert

Given that I am not even allowed to sing in the shower here by myself, there is no chance of me singing and exposing the world. I want at least some people to remain amidst the living to read this blog. {*grin*}

#3 – Camera Eyes

My approach is a bit different. When I can’t see with the eyes I have, I put on a new pair of eyes in my imagination and look at the world in a new light. I find that is usually very helpful. With a camera, you can only look at what is really there in a different way; with your imagination you can look at what isn’t really there in a way that illuminates what is really there in a different way. One might say that they are two different means to reaching the same end – a different way of seeing reality.

#4 – Getting Stoned

I don’t know if I have ever cast the first stone and then been stoned myself, but I have certainly had moments of utter non-understanding and cluelessness towards others. There is one judgment that lingers powerfully; friends and I have discussed it several times over the years.

When we were young, we often thought of some of our classmates/friends as weird, wild, flighty, or just plain out there. This judgment was often made without much deep thought or attempts at understanding. Now more than 40 years later and with additional information in hand, we realize that many times they had home and life situations that made them the way they were.

Somehow you always assume that everyone has a life like yours, free of abuse and exploitation. Unfortunately, that isn’t always true. I doubt that it would have changed anything, but I rue making those judgments and not being able to spot the underlying problem. Even one understanding friend could have made all the difference in dealing with the problem they faced. It might have kept those who took their own lives amidst the living.

At least there is hope that it *is* getting better.

#5 – Spring Trends

Fashion advice? From me? I don’t think so.

Haiku To You Too

Time once more for Mama Kat’s Writer’s Challenge.

Being short of time and long of tooth, I choose to persue

3.) Write a Haiku that describes what you love about an ordinary day.
(inspired by Jade from Now that I’m no longer 25…)

as my topic of choice.

The Ordinary Day Haikus
Morning comes upon us
Life renews again
A gift from the sun
Snow atop
Rain below
The mountain reigns
Hot dry itchy wind
Cold wet soothing stream
Balance is inherent

The Vain Blindsided Ego

Time once more for Mama Kat’s Writer’s Challenge.

This week the prompts are:

1.) You’re so vain. You probably think this post is about you…don’t you?
2.) Tell us about your trip!
3.) A difficult conversation.
4.) Can you almost stop time with your words? Write about the fastest ride you ever had, but describe only a few seconds of it…as though it was happening to slow motion.
(writingfix.com)

5.) Who blind-sided you? Write about a time someone caught you totally off guard.
(writingfix.com)

I will cogitate and then scribe, scribble, set forth, type, etc. on #1 and #5 for the nonce.

#1 – I don’t think the post is about me, I know it is! After all, there could be no more interesting subject for a post than the illustrious trio of me, myself, and I.

Your post is about women’s feminine products – it is still about me. I just know it. Even if your post is about some horrible TV show I have never seen such as American Idol or Lost or The Bachelor or … I still know it is about me, if for no other reason than to annoy me.

Every since the moment of my birth, I’ve known that it is all about me. There was never the slightest doubt in my mind. But I am glad that you are finally catching on, it is tiring to keep reminding everyone to stay on topic -ME!!!

Now if you don’t mind, I have to get back to checking out what everyone is saying about me.

#5 – Blindside

Verb 1. blindside – catch unawares, especially with harmful consequences;
2. blindside – attack or hit on or from the side where the attacked person’s view is obstructed


So let’s go with a combination of definitions 1 and 2.

Way back in the time of the dinosaurs, I played football. It was so long ago that it was in the first years of allowing freshman to play on the varsity teams. I was one of the fortunate (or unfortunate) persons selected to play on the varsity during my freshman year. Given that it was the first year that frosh were allowed to play varsity, there was a certain amount of animosity from the upperclassmen about the intrusion onto their turf.

One fine day we were practicing kickoff coverage. You know, where you run like mad at each other from great distances with the goal of killing each other and then tackling the guy with the ball. The whistle blew signaling the end of the drill and I started to relax when I heard my name shouted from behind me. I turned just in time to be blindsided by the person whose place I had taken. He had a 30 yard run to get up to speed and imparted all of his momentum to me. I must have flown 20 feet through the air to land on my butt. Of course, the perpetrator was laughing his rear end off. He thought it was pretty funny.

I filed his poor behavior away under the revenge area of my mind and continued on. The chance for revenge came the very next day during practice, but I didn’t even get a chance to do anything. Seems that his behavior wasn’t well accepted by his classmates (and my teammates) and they took turns blindsiding him in every drill we did that day. He wasn’t real bright and didn’t catch on until near the end of practice and so suffered a number of trips through the air. I actually felt a bit sorry for him.

I never had another bit of trouble with him. It was a great lesson to me about the power of teammates.

Now I come prepared for all blindsides, for in politics and fund raising, everything is allowed. {*grin*}

I’m Better Off Without It

Time once more for the wonders of Mama Kat’s Writer’s Challenge. This week I take on the topic of:

1.) 10 Reasons why you’re better off without him….or her….or it.

My reasons why I am better off without it:

  • It is slow.
  • It is old.
  • It generates enough heat in operation to warm the whole house.
  • It generates more noise than a jet idling by your ear.
  • It uses proprietary accessories.
  • It is “No longer supported” hardware.
  • It is “No longer supported” software.
  • The optical drive is broken.
  • The built in Ethernet is broken.
  • It burns more electricity per year than the cost of a modern replacement.
  • It weighs more than 150 lbs.

Have you figured out what it is? It is my old domain backup system manufactured by the no longer extant Sun Microsystems. It was top of the line back in the late 90’s when I acquired it, but today its job can be done faster by a cheap Intel box. The only bad thing is that the beast has been reliable as heck. For the last 11 years it has had less than 10 minutes of unplanned downtime. Its replacement box averages that much downtime per month.

So long old friend.

Baby, It’s Cold Outside …

Time once more for Mama Kat’s Writers Challenge. This week I like

2.) Describe your worst winter weather story.
(inspired by Alisha from A Day In The Life Of Okie Rednecks)

3.) Tell us about that scar.
(inspired by Katie from Rooftop Harmonies)

 as the prompts to follow in my writing for the nonce.

#2 – The worst weather story is a toss up because the prompt could be taken in several ways: the worst weather experienced in winter, the worst story involving winter weather in some way, or the worst story heard during winter weather. So after 3 microseconds of deliberation, I settled on this one:

Part of my research work when I was at Argonne National Laboratory involved giving academic seminars at universities. One fine February I was scheduled to give a Friday seminar at Iowa State University in Ames. What followed was a real nightmare.

I caught a flight out of O’Hare mid-day on Thursday. The weather called for snow later in the day at Ames, but it was not supposed to cause problems. Now at this point you need to know that I am one of those fortunate people who had two complete sets of wisdom teeth grow completely in. As the last pair rose to full height, I started not being able to close my jaw fully and so the extra teeth were scheduled for removal.

(Have you figure our where this is going?) Mid way to Ames, I hear a crack and suddenly have a mouth full of what feels like gravel. When I examine the detritus, I have a sneaking suspicion that one of my extra teeth had broken. A few cursive probes of the tongue quickly confirmed that I suddenly had a really jagged stump in the back of my jaw.

My first thought was the standard “How long before this bugger really starts to hurt?” That was followed by “What else could go wrong?” I should never have asked that second question. At that point the pilot comes on the intercom and explains that Ames is in the midst of a blizzard, but we may still be able to make it in. So we all are ordered to strap in and the pilot guns it to try and beat the closure of the airport.

We come barreling in for a landing, bobbing and weaving in the winds like a leaf in the autumn winds. It is snowing so hard I can’t even see the wing out the window to my right. The pilot comes on back on the intercom and announces that they have closed the airport just as our wheels touched down. We are the last plane that will make it in or out that day. But wait, there is further good news. The Ames airport is connected to the rest of civilization by a number of miles of isolated road. Guess what is also closed – you guessed it, the road to/from the airport.

So let us recap. I have a tooth that has shattered and which I deeply fear will begin to hurt shortly. I am trapped in a closed airport for an unknown length of time in a huge blizzard miles away from the nearest dentist. A few hours of stewing and pacing insures an increasing state of anxiety.

Finally, after eight hours of stewing and fretting and pacing and dreading, the snow plows finally got the road to/from the airport opened enough for a caravan from the airport to town to follow then. At about 1am I get to the hotel and collapse. I have decided that it the tooth hasn’t started hurting by now, it might not start until I can get back to Chicago. At least I sure hope so.

Bright and early I had breakfast with some of the faculty from ISU, with fewer in attendance than planned because guess what – there is a blizzard still blowing and snowing out there and they can’t make it to campus. Throughout the day several people asked me if I was distracted about something. If only they knew.

Scars? What scars? Just because I have scars from head to toe doesn’t mean they are special. I know where my scars are because I suffer from a condition where my scar tissue will not stop growing. When I have surgery, the scar usually has to be irradiated to stop the excess tissue growth.  So I’m going to talk about one of my non-surgical scars.

Many years ago when I was a pre-schooler, my brother and I shared a bedroom and set of bunk-beds. Being the older brother, I had the upper bunk. One day as I climbed the wooden ladder up to my bunk, the ladder broke. The sharp end of the bottom half of the ladder hit and skewered the side of my head, barely missing my eye.

A lot of crying and bleeding followed. There was enough blood that mom couldn’t see where the cut was at first. I knew it was serious because it was one of the few times I ever saw my mom even slightly rattled. A lot of wet cold towels and ice later it quit bleeding. A nurse friend of mom’s came over to look at it to see if we needed to journey the miles to the hospital. The nurse said that it might not hurt to get stitches, but that since the bleeding had stopped, etc. they’d just dress it and see how it was the next day.

That is how I got the scar to the side of my left eye. Yeah, the scar that becomes more and more obvious the older I get and the further my hairline sprints from it. That scar.